Three months later, where is everybody?

The first three weeks after we lose a loved one is often filled with calls and visits from concerned friends and family. Neighbours pop in or stop you in the street to ask how you are doing. You feel a level of support. Three months in, my clients tell me, is when it seems toContinue reading “Three months later, where is everybody?”

Be there to listen; even when you don’t know what to say

When someone dies, we often find it difficult to know what to say to the people they’ve left behind.  Strangely, rather than overcoming this sense of embarrassment, we often avoid having a conversation at a time when, by just being there to listen, we could make such a huge difference.

Planning a wedding to please everyone (and other ideas that will drive you to the edge)

You know your mother has always dreamed of giving you the Big White Wedding, the one her parents couldn’t afford for her.  You know your dad will be nervous but proud in equal measure and has been keeping his top-hat specifically for your big-day.  You’ve got to accommodate every diet from gluten-free to vegan, viaContinue reading “Planning a wedding to please everyone (and other ideas that will drive you to the edge)”

Perhaps it’s my age…

perhaps it’s my age, liberating me from unhelpful embarassment and restraint; perhaps it’s my illness and the concept of living every day as if it might be my last; perhaps it’s just that it was the right time for me to free myself and express opinions without fear of offending or starting a real discussion.Continue reading “Perhaps it’s my age…”

In my opinion…

  In my opinion, there is too much hate in the world.  Too many young people taught to continue the hatred developed and nurtured by their elders and ancestors. Too many reasons found to continue the hate despite all the obvious ones to end it, to move on. in my opinion, there are too manyContinue reading “In my opinion…”

Was it something I didn’t say?

We’ve all heard ourselves, and others, say it: “Was it something I said?” often in total confusion, as we wrack our minds to work out what it was we said that could have resulted in the reaction we see in another. I wonder though, how often it is what has gone UN-said that really causesContinue reading “Was it something I didn’t say?”

Give the gift of saying “Thank You”

“Really? What this old thing?” “You’re joking, this makes my bum look enormous!” “That’s sweet of you to say; when did you last get your eyes tested?”…… Sound familiar?  What is it that makes it so hard to accept a compliment at face-value and respond with “Thank you”?  What is the force that prevents soContinue reading “Give the gift of saying “Thank You””

Will you choose Fire or Water?

Choices impact every aspect of our communication with others and one of the key areas we can make a choice to change, is in communication that leads to arguments or confrontation.  When a conversation starts to head towards an argument, you can make a choice –  will I fight fire with fire or will IContinue reading “Will you choose Fire or Water?”